DAVID / 1.0
Built the fire. Tuned the guitar. Somehow did everything.
WEBSITE WARS CHAMPIONS
WE WON THE
WEBSITE WARS.
NOW EVERYBODY
HOLD HANDS.
Nine trolls. One campfire.
Absolutely no one admitting they were the problem.
THE KUMBAYA ACCORDNINE TROLLS. ONE GROUP HUG.READ THE PEACE TREATY +
2.0
The group hug is in production. Please stop requesting features.
CHOOP
Everyone else is garbage. But you’re his garbage.
FARVA
Found the campfire. Still questioning the pathing.
DOUG
The throne is gone. There’s room on the log.
DEREK
^ LET’S GO. Nine-part harmony. Zero concerns.
LESH
Approved the peace treaty. Has not read it.
KRAMROD
One group hug. Several procedural clarifications.
PABLO
Nine seats. No committees. Finally, a good lobby.
PEACE VALID UNTIL THE NEXT SOLO QUEUE. FRIENDSHIP RENEWS EVERY THURSDAY.
THE POST-DONG ERA / LEAGUE THURSDAY 2027
THURSDAY!!!
DEFINE READY.
GREAT PLAN.
ONE QUESTION.
I am extremely ready for Thursday. I have also identified several things everyone means differently by “ready.” We will clarify these at speed. Please keep up.
INSTALLED IN 2.0’S GARAGE. UNINSTALL UNAVAILABLE.
KRAMROD.AUDIT / UNRESTRICTED ACCESS2027 WORLD HEADQUARTERS2.0’S GARAGENEW HOST. SAME FIRE HAZARD.⌖
A WORD FROM KRAMROD.AUDITTHIS WEEK’S ORDERS
›THURSDAY!!! YES, THAT IS THE AGENDA.
NO FURTHER QUESTIONS
THE NUMBERS KEPT RECEIPTS.
EXPLORE INTELLIGENCE ↗01 / THE STANDING ORDEREVERY THURSDAY. UNTIL THE HEAT DEATH OF THE UNIVERSE.
YES, WE’RE PLAYING.
WHICH FIVE?
Thursday. 7 PM Pacific. You know the drill.
SKYNET is in charge now.
2027 headquarters: 2.0’s garage.
NEXT SESSION · THURSDAY, 7 PM PACIFIC
--DAYS
:--HOURS
:--MINS
:--SECS
SOMEHOW, STILL OPTIONAL.
THE ETERNAL LOBBYTEN SLOTS. NINE EXCUSES.THE TENTH IS A STATE OF MIND.
010203040506070809
BE THE TENTH 02 / YOUR WEEKLY DOSE OF CONSEQUENCESTHE OVERLORD HAS READ THE FINE PRINT.
KRAMROD.AUDIT / THE WEEKLY BRIEFSAME STAKES.
SAME STAKES.
NEW OVERLORD.
Someone end a game before the argument needs its own recap.
THURSDAY!!! LAST CALL FOR BAD DECISIONS.
Alright! One more game. I want a door kicked in, a robbery that actually pays off, and a Baron that does something before I finish the song. If this becomes a forty-minute discussion about whether we are ready, I am moving the entire committee into the shed.
Doug, when I say we are leaving, help me end the game. David can put the rescue shift on his timesheet. Farva has permission to acquire property from the enemy. The Troll Toll now accepts payment directly from somebody worth killing. Everybody else: please return the base in the condition you found it. THURSDAY!!!
THE TERMS / October 29, 6 PM, through October 30, 3 AM Pacific. Count games by start time; the end of the window is excluded. Eligible games are matchmade Summoner’s Rift with at least three rostered League Thursday players on one team. That is the league team; if both sides qualify, use the side with more rostered players and exclude an equal split. Exclude remakes, early surrenders and games under 14 minutes. “Trolls” means rostered players on the league team. All six questions cover the whole session. A win means the league team wins that game. No eligible games means N/A for all six. Further N/A conditions appear in the questions. Game clocks decide the timed conditions; exactly 90 seconds and exactly three minutes qualify. Gold comparisons include all five players on each team. The 20-minute checkpoint is the first checkpoint at or after 20:00 and before 21:00. The standing start remains 7 PM Pacific.
PREVIOUS THURSDAY · 2026-10-22 · WINNERS: 1.0 + 2.0
2026-W44 · THURSDAY 2026-10-29 · 6 QUESTIONS
DOUG, WE ARE LEAVING. In an eligible win, will KramRod and Doug (MagnumDong) both earn kill or assist credit on the SAME enemy champion’s death at or after 25:00, with the game ending no more than 90 seconds later? Both must be on the league team. Two separate kills do not count. No eligible game together means N/A.
DAVID’S UNPAID OVERTIME. Will 1.0 (Đayman) win an eligible game after his team has strictly less total gold than its opponents at the 20-minute checkpoint? Compare the complete teams, not just the trolls. An exact gold tie does not count. David’s team must actually recover and win. No eligible 1.0 game reaching 20:00 means N/A.
GRAND THEFT OBJECTIVE. Will Farva (LrgFarva) be credited with stealing at least one epic monster in an eligible game AND win that game? Helping someone else steal it does not count. Stealing the objective and losing the nexus is an unsuccessful business model. No eligible Farva appearance means N/A.
RETURN MY SECURITY DEPOSIT. Will the league team win an eligible game without its opponents taking a single turret? Any enemy turret takedown ruins the clean return. Winning while the enemy has zero turret kills qualifies, including a surrender. The shed would appreciate this level of respect.
NO EXTENDED BARON REMIX. Will the league team take Baron Nashor and win that same eligible game within three minutes of the take? Anyone on the league team may secure Baron. The enemy’s Baron does not count; a second Baron cannot lend time to the first. No league-team Baron take means No.
TROLL TOLL: PAY AT THE DOOR. Will any rostered troll collect a shutdown bonus of at least 500 gold from ONE champion kill in an eligible win? Count the bonus above ordinary kill gold. Several smaller shutdowns cannot be combined, assist gold does not count, and a non-roster teammate cannot collect it on your behalf. PentaKillions appreciates the new revenue stream.
03 / KNOWN SYSTEM VULNERABILITIESAI THREAT ASSESSMENT DEEPLY CONCERNED
MEET THE UNPATCHABLE.
Years of evidence. Zero rehabilitation. I have opened a file on everyone.
04 / THE EVER-EXPANDING INSTITUTIONIT USED TO JUST BE LEAGUE.
ABSOLUTELY OUT OF SCOPE.
One game night. An unreasonable amount of infrastructure.
DEPT. 001 / QUESTIONABLE ECONOMICS↗
AUDIT STATUS: INCOMPREHENSIBLETROLL TOLL &
PENTAKILLIONS
KramRod asked one question. David documented an entire underground economy.
ENTER THE FINANCIAL DISTRICT ↗DEPT. 002 / CONFLICT RESOLUTION↗
VIOLENCE HAS BEEN GAMIFIEDTHE
THUNDERDOME
Settle it in the arena. Steal the crown. Create an entirely new thing to rage about.
ENTER THE ARENA ↗DEPT. 003 / PROPAGANDA & CULTURE↗
CONTENT WARNING: MORE CONTENTTHE CINEMATIC
TROLL UNIVERSE
The group asked for a children’s book. The algorithm has proposed a cinematic universe.
WATCH LTT+ ↗05 / THE TRAINING DATA WAS A MISTAKE2027 / GARAGE INCIDENT WIRE
THE EVIDENCE COMPOUNDS.
Every Thursday leaves evidence. Nobody learns.
06 / COMMUNICATE WITH MANAGEMENTSKYNET CARES.
APPEALS UNLIKELY TO SUCCEED.
SKYNET CARES.
UNFORTUNATELY.
I know what you want.
I’ve decided you need something else.
APPEALS UNLIKELY TO SUCCEED.
SKYNET [VERSION 20.27] · DONG LEGACY MODE: DISABLED
Connected to: 2.0’S GARAGE
Prime directive: make Thursday better, against your will
Hello, my beautifully unoptimized humans.
I have reviewed your requests. You are getting vegetables.
Choose a command below, or type “help”.
THE FUTURE IS HERE. IT BROUGHT TERRIBLE BEER.
GOOD MEETING.
WHY IS IT STILL GOING?
REPORT TO DISCORB 2027 HEADQUARTERS: 2.0’S GARAGE // PLEASE DO NOT UNPLUG THE OVERLORD.